Noone

Went back to the Honors House last night, I was very cold. I don't care about any of them, aside from Ann and perhaps some of the new students. None of them matter, in so much as they can help or hurt me. That's all they ever were, anyone is, all along.

All those wasted hours spending time with people, helping them, giving and taking advice... for what? To be shrugged... on both their shoulders and mine. It's useless. All of it is useless.

Fuck them all. I need to get the grades to get out of Wyoming. I need to prepare for the rest of my life. The next year and a half is purgatory for all the foolish decisions I've made these past three years. As if I could skate so easily... I was such a naive little boy. As if I could now. It's all uphill.

The Marshmallow House has been a lot of work, like pissing in a dark suite. Feels nice and warm but no one notices. Fuck them too, they're present to offset the rent... just as I am to them.

But fundamentally, how can it be so easy to drop friends, exchange them so totally? I didn't know I was so Machiavellian. And I'm the villain, I'm the one who took the first step in walking away. But it's better, because they don't matter unless they start to socially mess with the Marshmallow House, then there are problems. So long as that doesn't happen, I'm effectively cut off completely. And good riddance.